So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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