Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
