well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
