We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
