I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
So. Much. Porn.
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