Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
