True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Why is there bacon in the couch?
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