Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Randomize
