sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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