Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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