We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Randomize
