That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Randomize