areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
tequila makes me forget i have legs
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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