Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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