Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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