We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize