I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
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