Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Randomize
