is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Randomize