He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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