Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
