maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
