Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
