i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
You have to summon your inner elephant
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize
