i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
