Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Randomize
