the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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