I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
