no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
