All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize