threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
