White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
