we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Randomize
