return my video game
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
