I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
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