I wish I could teleport
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
