that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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