How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Randomize
