I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
