going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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