Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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