Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize