Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
i out mim tonsoeep
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
