i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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