You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
