Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
