hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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