i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
My pussy is not your playground.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize