There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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