I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Randomize
