ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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