So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize