I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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